Christmas Eve

Wow! Our first Christmas Eve as a family of three!! Tuesday I put together a triple layer chocolate fudge cake to take to Tim's family for our Christmas dinner and family time. I was soo glad I got to bring dessert!! Elisha was so excited to watch me make the cake, and we talked about how we were going to be having a birthday party at Mamaw and Papaw's the next day. We even practiced singing Happy Birthday :0)
Christmas eve finally dawned. What a time. As I mentioned before, this has been such an emotional time for me- mostly incredibly great emotions :0) We headed over to Mamaw and Papaw's a little after noon to partake in the family meal. Yummy!! Everyone had their fill and then we all headed into the living room.Elisha had no problem jumping into the frey and wrestling with Uncle Jeff. I have found that this is one of the traditions the Christmas celebration wouldn't be the same without- though the grandkids are beginning to slowly get bigger and outnumber him.....

Elisha was starting to get the hang of this now. He was sooo excited (and past his nap), and was trying to drag Papa in to "Open peh-ants!!!" (Open presents). It was a very relaxed opening of gifts. It was so nice to have the flexibility to do that. Elisha would open up one present, we'd look at it, take it out of the box, play for a little bit- then he'd open the next. It was fun to be able to watch him and the excitement as he opened each special gift from all his loving family in the room.That is, until we got to the BIG box from Mamaw and Papaw. WOW!!! They got him a real set of drums. They are beautiful!! Cherry red and silver- what a beautiful thing!! We just let him look at the picture so we could wait until we got home to set up the drum set. Boy, was he excited!! Big Boom Booms!!

I was actually able to get him to lay down and sleep (with a little help from Mamaw...) at Mamaw's house. The whole family just rested together- some napping, some quietly talking. Papa had to go to church early since he was acting in the drama at church.

We woke Elisha and headed out to church. We saved seats up front- second row back :0), but ended up only the kids came and sat with me. Too close for the adults :0) Our worship band (minus me :0P) came out and sang a few carols as an opener. Elisha was excited to see Joe the drummer and Papa singing- he kept waving and yelling, "HI!" and wanting to go on stage with Papa.

At one point, he wanted to sit with Wesley, his cousin, who was in front of us. I looked down and they have their arms around each other, Elisha's head on Wesley's shoulder. How Sweet!! I wish I had my camera for that one.....!!!

We headed back to Mamaw and Papaw's, had some snacks, played with our new toys, watched a little TV while the other adults played some games. Then, a little before 9, Elisha was becoming a bit more hyper than his cousins could handle, so we drove across the road, got a quick bath, and when Papa came up the drive, we jumped back in the car and headed back over to Mamaw's to sing Happy Birthday Jesus and blow out candles.

Here are Mamaw, Cheyenne, Wesley and Mama and Elisha (just behind Mamaw) as she lights the candles.

Happy Birthday, Jesus!! Here we are all singing to the infant King.

No stores open had ice cream, so Mamaw got out the ice cream maker while we were snacking earlier and we had homemade vanilla ice cream to go with the cake. Now I wouldn't mind making that one a family tradition!! Yummy!!The Grandchildren

The Grandchildren with Mamaw and Papaw.

The whole family

It was a late night for us all. Tim and I got the new "real" drums set up so Elisha could play on them in the morning. We got everything ready, and then settled down for a long winter's nap.......

Nun kum ou!!

Today as we were on our way to church, the sun was shining brilliantly through the car window. It was quite striking, actually. It has been rainy and overcast for so many days, to see the beautiful rays touching the water, skimming over the tree tops, sparkling on the road and lighting the places where the ice was resting was just a special blessing. My whole body warmed with the glow it produced.

Elisha had some sun shining right in his face..... He excitedly looked at me and said, "Mama, nun kum ou !!!!! Gdood job, nun!!!" (Mama, sun come out!!!! Good job, sun!!) As I looked back in the rear view mirror, he was giving the sun a thumbs up. Good job, sun!!

He made it through the Christmas Cantata at church this morning, staying in the service so he could enjoy the music and watch Papa sing. He clapped and cheered- even when everyone else was quiet.... :0)
I told him he had to be quiet while Paul, the narrator, was speaking. So, after that, every time Paul would start speaking, Elisha would glance up at me and say, "Paul done?" He would begin praying when others were praying, wait about 30 secs and then say,"Amen," and be ready to go on to the next thing.

I can't believe how emotional all this is for me. Three Christmases ago I was researching adoption agencies, filling out forms and beginning the process of becoming pregnant in my heart, just knowing that God had a child for us. Two Christmases ago I was laboring in my mind wondering if we had somehow missed God's calling that we were to find our son out there and adopt him and bring him home. The adoption process had been shut down for several months with no end in sight. Last Christmas.... Wow... Last Christmas was profoundly different. It was so hard to know where our son was, and know that we couldn't be with him, and not even be sure when or possibly if we could bring him home.

This Christmas. How much more real it all is for me. Not the Santa and the Ho Ho and the things we usually think of when we mention Christmas. The night, soooo very long ago, when a very young woman gave birth to a child. I look at my son many times and wonder what he might decide to do when he grows up. All these feelings that come with being a parent are amazing in and of themselves. Can you imagine if you looked at your little son, wrapped up tight, sleeping the sleep of the innocent in your arms and knew what prophecy had to say about that little boy. Oh Mary, what did you ponder??

This Christmas I am holding our son, the child of the promise to us from God. As the Cantata swelled and came to the final song, the banners waving as we sang all together to Jesus, I couldn't help a little sob escaping. Elisha was mesmerized by the flags, snuggled close to my heart, listening to the anthems being raised to Christ the Savior. Oh, my precious son, my you come to know God sooo fully. I pray constantly that we would be the parents God would have us to be to raise you to know Him as fully as you can. My precious child, I wish that could be my gift. There wouldn't be ribbons or bows enough to be able to contain it, for I am finding with each season of my life that deep abiding love from God just continues to grow and become stronger.

Thank you, God, for wonderful moments and warm sunshine to fill our hearts and the amazing gift you gave us that we celebrate now! May it all become more real to us than ever before.

Red Light- Stop

Just over the past few weeks, it has amazed us how much Elisha has grown. He is talking so much more clearly and putting more complex thoughts together.

Every time just the 2 of us head off in the car, he wants to know if we are driving to Grammalot's house, or Gwama and Gwampa's house, or to see Papa at work. He knows the gas pedal, the brake and points them out as I'm fastening him in to his car seat.

He is becoming so aware of the world around him- the "Rai comi dow from ky"- or the "No falling dow from ky" (rain and snow falling down from sky).

His big thing the last week has been the traffic lights. He says his r's with an l- so it comes out something like this......

We'll be driving down the road and come to a traffic light that is red. As I slow down, he says, "Lre ligh top!!" (red light stop!!) Followed with, "reen ligh Go GO GO!!!!" And if we happen to be slowing down for a yellow light, he says, "Ylellow ligh low down!!"

I think he is more aware of vehicles than I was in my early teen years! He pretends his potty seat is a big truck- he steps to the side, opens the pretend door, steps over the seat sideways, sits down, "closes" the imaginary door and starts up the engine. He puts his feet on my feet and uses them as the break and gas. I am totally loving his imagination. We have so many adventures!!

What a month.....

Wow!! I can't believe how much has happened since the last I posted- hang in- this is going to be a long post...... but lots of pics :0)

When we went to visit Papaw in the hospital (wow- it has been well over a month ago now!!) Aunt Linda and Uncle Gary were there. Elisha was having a little bit of a problem saying Uncle Gary's name, so we made it a roar like a lion.... Uncle Ggggrrrrreeeey. As we were preparing to go to my Mother-in-law's family's Thanksgiving dinner, the weekend before Thanksgiving, I was telling him the names of some of the people he knew that would be there. We did all our immediate family first, then named some of the aunts and uncles.

Wasn't even thinking about the time in the hospital- but Elisha remembered. As soon as I said Uncle Gary- his little face lights up and he says, "Unka Ggggrrrrrreeeey." It is so precious!! We laughed so hard. He keeps coming up with it. We'll be driving along the road, and he'll say, "Unka Grrrreeeyy."

Had a great time with all Tim's family on his mom's side. They had seen Elisha 2 days after arriving home from Russia (for the family Easter celebration), so were able to see how much he has changed. It was nice to see everyone and spend time together.

We drove over to Columbus on Thanksgiving Day and had dinner and spent time with Papa, who had to work. The guys at the firehouse do a great job putting together some delicious food. We had a fun time in fellowship with everyone. One of Tim's coworkers and his wife brought their daughter in. When all the guys on duty got called out for a run, Elisha was quite content playing with his new friend, Gabby. He also had a blast playing "Gettem" with the Captain.

Grant would lay on the couch pretending to be asleep. Gabby and Eli would run over and wake him up- he'd come roaring down like a bear after them, they'd run across the room and into my arms, giggling, screaming, screeching. At one point, Elisha must have felt a little overwhelmed. He stopped mid run and turned around and waved a little hand to Grant and said, "Hi!!" After we got over our laughter from the abrupt change, and Grant stopped being the bear and smiled and waved hi back, Elisha turned and ran as fast as he could across the room to me. He did this several times. We were all laughing so much!!
Then he got to help Randy play his guitar. He just loved to be around all the guys, seeing his Papa on a duty day. What a lot to be thankful for!!

The next morning, we headed out for PA to visit with my folks. I was sooo excited to see them. They are waaaayyyyy too far away!! (and yet, it really isn't that far) Elisha talked about being excited to see Gwama and Gwampa. My dad likes this a lot better. When we first got home, he thought it would be great to be called the Russian form of Grandma and Grandpa- Babuska and Daduska. Unfortunately, it came out as BooBoo and DooDoo. Then it was Gwama Dudu. So, he is very content with Gwampa now :0)

Charity and Brian were in to visit, too. It was sooo good to see them. We talk on the phone, but they have only seen Elisha the one time at our family reunion in July. It was fun to watch the interactions with one of my siblings. Looking forward to Christmas when we can all be together, even if only for a few days.
Here is Elisha, playing the Fisher Price drum my Mom has had since my sisters were small. Sorry about the mirror, Dad.... lol Elisha's calling card..... :0)

Mom had some Kid's Craftsman tools for Elisha- he sure loved that- a tool belt and hat and all those tools. He was banging away on the little tool table talking about being "Jus li Papa!!"
Here are Elisha and Mama, enjoying being with the family...

Once we got back to Ohio, we had to get it in gear to get our outside decorations up. We wanted to be able to make this a very special Christmas for our little guy!!

Elisha and I went out to "help" Papa put the lights up around the house. Well, Papa and Mama got most of it done while Elisha napped. After nap, he came out to "help."

The look says it all, doesn't it? Wowowow!!



A few days later, we had some snowfall. So, one day, while Papa was at work, we got all bundled up and went out to play in the snow. The Russian grannies would be proud. Our son was bundled up so much- we thought we should call him "Randy," the little brother on The Christmas Story.

He went down and got his wheelbarrow out and was taking wood from the wood stack into the house- "Jus li Papa does!!" He had so much fun, and it was amazing to see the attention to detail he has. He'd tap the log off several times on the ground before putting it in his wheelbarrow to get the dirt off.

I have been thinking of my Grandma soo much lately, so when Tim told me he had to stay over and work last Saturday after being gone for work all day Friday, I decided to load up the car and take Elisha to Grandma's house for the weekend.

The trip went well, didn't get lost (this is funny if you realize I've been traveling there for over 30 years- but I usually sleep through parts of the trip- I've only driven it a few times by myself) and Elisha seemed so excited.

We stopped at Flying J to get gas as we started out (for only $1.53!!! a gallon) and as we were coming out of the convenience store and I was buckling him in, he started to wave. I looked over and saw a pretty unkempt man, missing several teeth. One I would be hesitant to be around in an unknown area. Then, as I watched, his face- one minute gnarled and foreboding- changed. He began to smile from his toes out! Such joy on his face- it made me smile. He leaned over and gave a little finger wave back to Elisha as he was getting into his beat up old car. Once he got seated, these boys, separated by generations, joined by a smile, began waving at each other again. Thank you, God, for these glimpses of you that I see through the eyes of a child!

When we got there, he warmed up instantly with Grandma- Grammalot to her great grandchildren. He remembered where he slept when we were there last and was as comfortable there as he is at home. I had been concerned that it would take a long time to warm up to her, and then be time to come home- but not so. He slept so well for naps, as well as at bedtime. What a blessing!!

He surprised both of us, Grandma and myself, when he remembered where everything was. He went over to the small table Grandma has set up in the kitchen. It is an older table with a drawer in it. This is where Grandma keeps her silverware. Elisha went right over to it when it was almost time to eat to get the spoons out. Amazing......! He was at her house for 2 nights back in April and then again in July- with 70 other people there for a family reunion.

One of his favorite games there was for me to chase him and him run right into Grammalot's arms as she sat in the chair. There is a ramp going up from the living room into the rest of the house. He loved running up and down it. I was able to get some video of that- but it takes soooo long to upload video and pics, not sure if I'll have the time to post it or not. He also loved eating next to Grandma. I loved watching them. He'd just look over at her and put his head on her arm, then look up and smile and grin.

We went to church with Grammalot on Sunday. They had their children's Christmas program followed by a soup and sandwich supper afterward. It amazed me to realize that the tables that Elisha was able to run under, barely ducking, in April, were now about level with his shoulders. Hard to believe how much he's grown.
Here he is giving "Grammalock" lots of hugs and kisses as we prepared to leave.

After I got home from work on Wed, I got out the sugar cookie making supplies and Elisha and I baked Christmas cookies. What a hoot!! It was a lot of fun. Papa came up just as we finished cutting out the last cookie. When we finished dinner, I threw together some butter cream frosting and then did something that very rarely happens. I let Elisha lick the beater.

You could see the yumm on his face. After the first lick, he seemed a little uncertain- I said, "Are you done?" and he grabbed the beater and thoroughly enjoyed licking a little off each tine. AAhhhhh... the joys of Christmas baking....
Papa took him upstairs and gave him a bath while I started frosting the cookies. They made it downstairs as I was halfway through with the cookies.
Here is Elisha helping Papa put the sprinkles on the cookies. Most of his conversation was a sort of question the whole evening.... "Lya ea cookie now???" "Lya ea cookies now??" (Elisha eat cookies?) At one point, as I'm getting the remaining frosting out of the piping bag, Tim putting away the camera, Elisha walked over, dragged over his stool, said, "Lya ea cookie." (Notice the period here. I realized later it wasn't a question.... :0) As I'm saying, "No honey, not now- we'll eat some tomorrow," I look over and he has a cookie in his hand and is taking a bite. lol . ... I have to admit, they are pretty good :0)

Ok- now I can sleep at night. I've had these thoughts floating around my head for a month now, wanting to write them down, put up pics, etc.

It has been quite hectic around here, and also quite emotional for us. A wonderful woman we never met, yet feel we know quite well through our adoption agency, lost her battle with cancer this week. Or should I say won her battle and now has a new pain free body. Such a courageous, positive, amazing woman- I rejoice for her and weep for the rest of us still here. She was such a shining influence and great encourager. She and her husband adopted their son from the same orphanage that Elisha is from, a little over 3 years ago, and her lists, postings and pictures made the area seem familiar to us and gave us that little extra we needed to be able to prepare for our journey. We are keeping her husband and 3 children (2 just adopted this year) in our prayers.

So, we are 1 week away from Christmas. What are you doing to prepare your heart and homes? May the most amazing gift of all, the greatest gift ever given fill your heart, mind and homes this year. May the stress we've made of the season fade away, the greed our culture makes normal dissipate and the loneliness cease. May we gather everyone around us close and remember the reason we celebrate this season to begin with.

The majesty, the drama, that quiet night, soo long ago when all creation past and future collectively held its breath at the cry of a newborn baby- the Lord incarnate- so weak and lowly. May your heart and mind hear his cooing and that amazing baby laugh and relax this season.

Looking forward to posting pics and stories of our first Christmas as a family of three.......

He's our son!

I was having a discussion with my mom the other day. It struck me as kinda funny, and wonderful. She was telling me about an old friend of mine that also has a little boy- 1 month younger than Elisha. My friend is an excellent football player, and really looks the part. I don't really know the positions well- not a sports fan- sorry!! But he's a line backer ( I think that's the part)

SOO, anyway, Mom was telling me that their little boy is almost 15 pounds heavier than Elisha. I jumped in and said that it wasn't surprising, since my friend is so much bigger than Tim. Mom asked if I just heard what I said. Well, I haven't been feeling well lately, so I repeated it, thinking I'd said something backwards. My friend has a larger frame and bigger bones, so it is really not surprising that his son would be bigger than Tim's son.

He, he, he, I guess we really can't compare Elisha's genes with Tim's. In my mind the adoption is over and complete, and he couldn't be any more our son than he is. Thank you God that the bonding process we prayed so hard for has gone so well, both for Elisha as well as us!!!

Giving Thanks

It is really hard to realize what we have this day set aside for, isn't it? Seems for some the gathering together is becoming more stressful, and both the tables and our bellies are groaning under the weight of our food.

I've been pondering a lot lately. Nothing new, I know, but Thanksgiving has been one of my favorite topics. The Bible tells us to "Give thanks with a grateful heart," and I was thinking the other day of some of my Mom's favorite advice to me when I call her as I'm in the "depths of despair," as Anne of Green Gables would say. "Think about your blessings- Thank God for all the amazing things He's done in your life...."

There is a song whose chorus goes something like this:

Count your blessings, name them one by one.
Count your blessings, see what God has done!
Count your blessings, name them one by one,
Count your many blessings, see what God has done!!

I got to thinking- if I truly did spend my time counting my blessings- I really wouldn't have any time to dwell on things that allow bitterness to take root in my heart. Not that there aren't hard times- I'm not trying to say there aren't. But I've been thinking that it really comes down to what I dwell on- what I allow to occupy my mind the most- that directs my thinking.

Hmmmmmm--- suppose Satan realizes this weakness in me and uses it to its fullest? I find I so often skim over the superkalafradgelisticexpialadocious (sp?) blessings (I couldn't think of a word to contain or even begin to describe it....), and focus on something minor and petty in the whole scheme of things- so I don't even enjoy the wonderful gifts my Father has given me. What an amazing thing our former President did, when Abraham Lincoln made this day set aside for thanking the Creator of the world for life and survival in this new land a national holiday.

So- there are soooo many things that come to my mind when I think of things I am thankful for. I am so thankful for the journey we were on to become a family- it has made me feel closer to God and more understanding of our relationship with Him as we went through the adoption process ourselves. I am so thankful that God gave us His Holy Spirit to lead and guide us-

I am often amazed that God put me in the family He did. No one is perfect, but my childhood was rather ideal- My husband's a wonderful, generous, talented, caring man of God, our son is so amazing I'm not sure where to start- we are surrounded by family and friends that have become like family, while carrying ties to our family further away that have become even stronger over the last few years.

I am thankful that a young woman, halfway around the world, chose to give birth to a beautiful little baby boy, even knowing that she couldn't care for him, and then gave him up to be adopted. Her following God's leading in her life to not "terminate" her pregnancy allowed our family to be formed.

I am so thankful for all the people who have joined us in this journey- whether in person, processing documents, appearing in court, preparing us for the journey, praying with us, consoling us, crying with us, sharing our joy- what a blessing it is to be able to come alongside our fellow mankind and bless them.

And all the "stuff" we have is just icing- but I am thankful for all that, too!!

I'm sure this could be "the list that does not end, it just goes on and on, my friend....." but I will pause now in my thinking to allow you to also contemplate all God has blessed you with. I pray He will open your eyes, just a little bit wider so you can be filled with the wonder and joy that the One that created you and knows everything about you, also chooses to bless you. Thank you, God!!

Impotent Fury

Just a few ramblings today....

We (Elisha and I) went to the local branch of the library today. Before we went, I applied more drops to my poor little baby's eyes. He squishes them up tight and tells me it burns as he whimpers a bit in my arms. It is so hard to do this for him- something I know needs to be done- for long term healing- but causing short term pain.

I got down his snowsuit jacket we bought while in Russia. When there, in March, we had to roll the sleeves up several inches- it fits just right now!! I tried to zip up the jacket. It made it all but 1 inch from the top- which then holds his neck like a whiplash collar. He said, "Too tigh!!" I remembered us having a problem when in Moscow, where the zipper got caught on the tender skin of his throat, so I had my finger behind the zipper. Well, he struggled away a little to loosen the zipper, and it began to unzip on it's own. Down..... down..... and then he starts crying- yelling it was "too tigh!!"

I tried to get it to unzip and realized it had, again, caught his flesh in the zipper. Aargh!! I was so furious with myself, since I was trying to be so careful, and also with the jacket- imagine that- fury at an inanimate object. I finally got it off, and he lay crying in my arms, my heart breaking with every whimper. He let me hold some ice in a paper towel on it for a few minutes, and then seemed fine.

I can't wait to sew a little strip of something so very soft on the inside of the jacket, so the zipper CANNOT do this any more.

Quick update.... he was playing with his jacket tonight- and really seems to like it- as long as I don't try to zip it up "Tigh" or tight :0) and his neck looks fine- just a few little red spots..... lol

After coming home from the library, it was time for drops again. This time he cried. He is so good, though. He'll lay on my lap and let me put them on his eyes- but this time he wouldn't open them- he just kept whimpering about how it burns. I am praying it will very soon ease and the burn will stop.

Today, I am praying for all those amazingly gifted parents of children who are very ill and for strength for those parents who have to do things for them that cause pain for the short term to enable long term healing. My deal with Elisha is so very minor compared to most- so I'm praying for those who have to deal with this on an ongoing basis. May God strengthen you and keep you in the palm of his hand- giving you strength to go on- and courage to know what needs to be done.

As we approach Thanksgiving time, I have been pondering more and more in my heart about all the blessings in my life. I put a note on my Facebook about a realization I had as I was thinking the other day...... If I were to truly count my blessings, naming them one by one, seeing all the Lord has done in my life, there would be no room to harbor bitterness, strife, envy, or even anger. I would be in a continual state of awe as I realize just what all my precious God has done for me. May you also be blown away as you take a few moments to reflect on all He has done for you.